9 Signs Mums Are in Desperate Need of Self-Care

 In Sleepy Mum

Dear sleepy mums,

Do you take care of yourself? I’m positive you’re taking care of your baby, but are you taking care of you too? Are you making sure your cup gets filled up again too?

I must admit that I didn’t see the importance of self-care when my daughter was a baby. The only self-care I had was napping when she napped.

It took me one year – that’s right, one year – before I actually did something for myself without my daughter by my side. I remember it very well. It was one hour of pedicure bliss with pink toenails as the result.

But was this the only result? Shiny toenails? Of course not!

I quickly realised, I needed to do this more often. Not only did it allow me some time for myself, it also allowed my husband to bond with our (at that time) very-attached-to-mummy daughter.

And in all honesty? My girl is now 2.5 years old, but my main care is still focused on her. I still don’t have any hobbies for me, but tons I do with her.

However, I do try to take a break from parenting now and then. Even if it’s just by stepping outside by myself, or talk to my family on Skype while hubby takes her to the park.

These simple things recharge my batteries and that is very much needed. How can I give to my daughter, if I’m absolutely depleted from energy?

Now, how can you know that you’re in desperate need of self-care? After all, it’s very easy to lose track of yourself when you’re always busy taking care of others. And then one day, you just find yourself completely drained and burnt out.

Let’s avoid feeling this way!

woman stretching arms after walking up, sitting on the bed, facing an open window

Self-Care Sign 1. You’re on Edge and Easily Agitated

Does everything that people do or say around you annoy you?

You know, when your husband chews a little too loudly. Or you’re kinda expecting him to read your mind.

Toys are scattered around the room. Your little one decides to ‘help’ with the laundry.

Everybody is always so much slower than you are at… well, everything.

If you’re easily agitated and frustrated, it may be time for you to take a time-out and look after yourself.

Self-Care Sign 2. You’re Constantly on the Go and on Autopilot

In all honesty, this fits me to the letter. I’ve always been on the go, always a busy bee. My husband often jokes that I’m a machine.

The funny thing is that I become even more active when I’m frustrated. Usually, that’s my ‘cue’ to start cleaning like a maniac. Bahaha!

If you’re in need of self-care, you’re most likely to have a long To Do-List and you do them almost on autopilot. You’ve become so used to just being busy all the time, that it’s become a habit.

In this case, you might also recognise sign number three.

Self-Care Sign 3. You Struggle to Stop and Just Be

When you do have a moment in your busy routine, you may struggle with the stillness.

You probably find yourself grabbing your phone to check the latest news. Or you’re wandering around the house looking for something to clean (which probably isn’t that difficult as a mum).

When your little one is (finally asleep), you may even wish for her to wake up again because you’re secretly feeling bored.

You’re wondering how you were even able to fill your time before you became a mum. What did you do with all that time you had?

Self-Care Sign 4. You Lost Your Mojo

Have you started to lose your enthusiasm for pretty much anything? Does it seem like the same day is just repeating itself over and over?

What’s that saying again? Oh, yes! Same s***t, different day.

If this is you, you might have to look for some self-care activities.

woman sleeping on table

Self-Care Sign 5. You Lost Your Optimism

Well, if you lost your mojo, you’ve most likely lost your optimism too. You struggle to look on the bright side of life.

Everything that goes wrong, even if it’s just something benign like not finding your keys, can feel like life is having a go at you. Your optimism is far out of reach.

Self-Care Sign 6. You Feel Isolated

When you’re constantly putting your little one first, doing only activities that she’ll love, and find that you’re interacting more with kids than adults, it’s very easy to feel isolated.

Time to get back to your hobby, or find yourself a new passion, that’s just for you. An activity that you can do with like-minded people. And with people, I do mean adults. Not kids!

Self-Care Sign 7. You’re Sick More Than Usual

Everybody knows it. It’s just common-sense. If you don’t take care of yourself, there’s a very high chance you’ll get sick.

You could also blame those terrible children’s germs, but really… you need to start taking care of yourself.

Make sure you eat healthy food and add some vitamins to the mix if needed. You can’t take care of your precious cargo if you’re not feeling well yourself.

Self-Care Sign 8. You’re All Over the Shop

Do you recognise this?

You see your unfolded laundry in the corner of the room and decide to get it done. On your way there, you find dirty pants on the floor (who put that there?). You pick them up, turn around, and throw them on the dirty laundry pile.

Going back, your eye catches the dirty plates on the kitchen counter, so you quickly put them in the dishwasher. In the meantime, your toddler asked for a drink.

This goes on and on, and then in the evening you realise your laundry is still not folded.

You’re just wobbling from one task to the other, and sometimes don’t even remember what you were supposed to be doing. Mind you, this could also be a sign you’re sleep deprived. Which kinda goes hand in hand with the need of self-care as well. 🙂

Self-Care Sign 9. You Can’t Remember Your Last Me-Time

What was the last thing you did for yourself? *Long pause* Uhm….

If you can’t remember what the last thing was that you did for yourself, it may be time to change this. Like asap.

Recharge your own battery, refill your cup, and you’ll be able to give a lot more to your little ones and husband.

Do you recognise any of these signs? If so, it may be time to schedule in some desperately needed self-care time.

Begin with small steps at a time. Some self-care ideas you can start with today are:

  • taking a walk by yourself once your husband gets home from work.
  • rest or read a book while hubby takes the kids out
  • take a long bath surrounded by candles and soothing music once the little one’s down for the night
  • keep a journal to jot down inspirational quotes, thoughts, or feelings
  • read and study the Bible (my personal favourite)
  • spend time praying (really works wonders for me)
  • listen to music and dance like no-one’s watching

Is there a self-care idea that relaxes you? Let me know in the comments below. 🙂

Talk soon,

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A sweet baby girl is sleeping on her back in her crib swaddled in a pink blanket.